Part 1 – Naming the Fears

The biggest deterrent to taking the actions that are necessary to live our dreams is FEAR. 

There are 7 deadly fears that stop us from living our dreams and if you want to fly in life rather than crawl, then mastering these fears is a MUST!

There are two main types of fear – there is rational fear and irrational fear.
The cold, hard, steel barrel of a gun is pressed against your forehead, your heart racing , your adrenaline pumping and you are in a heightened state of fear – this is rational fear.  Rational fear is when your survival is actually in threat, when you are in a situation that is on the hairline between life and death.  Every other fear that we have is completely irrational and exists only in the mind and not out in reality. Irrational fear is incredibly clever at trying to maintain the status quo and keep us away from ‘perceived’ threats to our ego’s survival rather than our physical survival.

There are 7 irrational fears that are deadly assassins of dreams. 

They are

1.    The fear of the power of authority or not fulfilling the wishes of authority

This fear is why the police work in some countries and don’t in others.   In South Africa the fear of the authority of law is not present amongst the criminal element and so they continue to take the action of committing crime.

2.    The fear of not knowing enough

This fear stops many people from following their dreams.  Some dreamers wish to start their own businesses but get paralysed before they even begin because they are concerned that they don’t know enough.  They spend time laboriously writing 100 page business plans because they believe that it is a good way to gain knowledge before starting.  The truth is that if you have a dream or a vision to do something then you have the ability to do it.  We are never sent vision or dreams of things that we can’t accomplish.  You may be stretched to reach your dream, but you will never be able to hold a vision of something that is unattainable.  The adage of “if you can dream it, you can do it” is absolute

3.    The fear of Failure

The threat of failure strikes terror into the hearts of people wanting to live their dreams and then because of this fear the person does not take action and so they sit in a world of failure anyway.  The paradox of success is that the only way to reach your dreams is to fail.  Somehow in a school system with rules of right and wrong we were taught that failure is bad and wrong.  If this is your take on failure then it is time to shift your perception and your view of failure to ensure that it doesn’t stop you from pursuing your goals.  (I will be writing more about ‘How to deal with Failure’ in a future Blog Post!)

4.    Fear that I won’t make enough money

The fear of bills stacked up at the end of the month and no funds in your bank account may be the convenient excuse that your small self uses to keep you in a job that you hate, with colleagues you despise and living a routine life of boredom.

Now examine your life and tell the truth. No matter what the circumstances you have always managed to get by. Somehow when it comes to money and what you need, you have always made a plan to survive.  Perhaps not thrive, but you have always survived.   So why do you think that living the life of following your dreams will be any different?

5.    The fear of losing the respect of a loved one

This was one of my major fears in becoming a Fairy Godmother. I was really concerned about how my mother would react to my creatively outlandish dream of becoming a modern-day fairytale character.

6.    The fear of rejection by society

This fear ripples out beyond the close circle of family, friends and acquaintances.   This fear is one where you are concerned about society as a whole.  This fear keeps Muslim women from venturing out without a male escort in Arab countries.    This fear has seen gay people hide their authentic selves in the proverbial closet because of the anti-gay sentiment prevalent until a few decades ago.   Bill Cosby has a beautiful quote that highlights the absurdity of this fear. He said “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.”

7.    The fear of ill health or lack of physical wellbeing

This fear is one of the reasons I have not yet strapped a parachute to my back and hurled myself out of a small plane circling thousands of feet above the earth.  I am worried about the SPLAT.    People who do adrenaline sports do not have this fear and consequently push themselves and their bodies through the envelope of possibility to kiss the beautiful rush that comes from moving beyond fear.

Now that you have become aware of these different types of fears that exist – which ones can you relate to?  There are probably two or three that really resonate for you – these are the fears that stop you.    I would love to hear from you as to how some of these fears show up in your life and stop you – comment below.

Next week you will be able to read Part 2 on how to Overcome these Fears!

So what happens when the clock strikes 12 and you seem to leave the ball and while you were having an incredible time in your dream, experiencing synchronicities, feeling that things were manifesting – something sends you straight back to your previous reality with a Bump?!! It could have been something someone said, a circumstance or a problem that triggers a shift back to your old reality and your way of being. But, because you have begun to experience the power of dreaming, this shift back to a previous state may feel highly uncomfortable and depressing and in this space negative thoughts can overwhelm you.

This is the breeding ground for the inner critic….. he is in his death throes, trying desperately to cling on the past identities in order to remain alive and in the inner critic’s fight for survival he will get nasty and will throw up each of your fears to challenge and confront you. These can be everything from

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