Recently I was asked by a curious dreamer what the key traits or characteristics are that define whether people live their dreams and achieve their goals or not. It is a great question and I came up with 4 things that I believe are pivotal and actually the only things needed…

1. Have a clear vision (that inspires the hell out of you!)

In my Dream Mapping and Goal Setting workshops, I help people get clear vision and I teach them how to create a WIG. WIG stands for Wildly Improbable Goal and this is a goal that ignites you, delights you, excites you and terrifies you all at the same time. A Wildly Improbable Goal is something that takes you to the boundaries of possibility and impossibility… it is a goal that STRETCHES you. Take you out of your comfort zone. And help you to create an EXTRAORDINARY life.

Step 1 in achieving your goals is to get CLEAR on what you want. Knowing what you want is the biggest factor in being able to achieve it.

Once you get clear – Write it down, cut out pictures of it and stick it up, tell other people in your life about it.

2. Overcome your Fears

Once you are clear about your goal, it is easy to listen to the inner voice that tries to talk you out of it. Those whisperings in your inner ear are simply FEAR. Fear is what stops us from taking actions on our goals. Fear is what makes up excuses rather than just doing it. Fear is what makes us procrastinate, feel lethargic or tempts us to distract ourselves from the task at hand.

I have written articles about the 7 Deadly Fears that stop us from living our dreams and how to overcome fear – read the articles.

3. Persistence

Even when you are struggling and facing huge obstacles NEVER, ever, ever, give-up!

There will be times on the journey where life is smooth-sailing and fun and there will be other times when you experience challenges. This is all part of the adventure of living a powerful life.  Persistence is what differentiates the truly extraordinary from the ordinary.

WE ARE NEVER ABLE TO DREAM UP A GOAL THAT WE CAN’T ACCOMPLISH.

I write extensively about this in my book “The Fairy Godmother’s Guide to Getting What you Want”. After working with thousands of people around the world to help them achieve their dreams and goals, I have realised that persistence is key.

When I am wanting to give up (and believe me there have been many “quitting moments” along this path of being a Fairy Godmother), I remind myself that ‘It is always darkest just before the dawn’ and that while things may seem bleak right now, I am on the edge of a breakthrough. And, of course, I do breakthrough.

4. Faith

Faith is the “power-tool” to call on which activates your ability to persist.

Elizabeth Gilbert, in her book ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ writes it perfectly

‘Faith is to pre-accept the terms of the universe and to embrace in advance what I am presently unable to understand…Faith is belief in what you cannot see or prove or touch. Faith is walking face-first and full speed into the dark…’

Faith is knowing that even though you are experiencing an obstacle or challenge right now, EVERYTHING is happening perfectly and everything is going to be okay. Faith is giving up your necessity to control every outcome and surrendering yourself to the greater plan of the divine.

Faith is realising that you are not the sole creator but the co-creator of your world. And that omnipotent knowledge and the ‘grand design’ are far more powerful and magnificent than your own ‘worms-eye-view’ of the world. Where your will and the will of the Divine meets, is where magic and miracles happen. Faith activates magic.

Today on 101.9 Chai FM at 15h10, I will be interviewing Tracy Gold who is an amazing South African clothing designer.

She runs the successful House of Tracy Gold and we will be chatting about her journey of living her dreams, as well as her philosophy on fashion  and how to make women not only look good, but feel good too.

If you want to know how to lose 5kg’s just by getting dressed in the morning, then tune in to the show!

Find Tracy Gold on FaceBook.

Hi Fairy Godmother

I’m worried that if my BIG dream of writing novels, was really what I was meant to do, wouldn’t it be easier?

Am I not rather a column writer – not a novelist?
I’ve always struggled to write something longer than an essay.
Maybe that is why it is difficult to think in terms of a novel. The whole plotting this is very foreign.
Yet at school I outlined my essays and wham. Got top marks in the class almost all the time.

Surely if this was my calling, I wouldn’t hesitate and wonder what I should write?!

Yes, big doubt on my side of the screen…

Many demons to be slayed.

A Doubtful Dreamer

Hi Doubtful Dreamer

Here’s the deal – As your Wildly improbable Goal (WIG) is to have movies made about your series of best-selling novels…. just to have been able to come up with that WIG you will be able to achieve it.  This is covered in great detail in my book, but

WE ARE NEVER ABLE TO DREAM UP A WIG THAT WE CAN’T ACCOMPLISH

I know that writing the “novel” is not “flowing” for you at the moment and you think that if it really is your purpose it should be easier!  When you start on the path of living your dreams it is NEVER easy  (especially if they are BIG wildly improbable goals).

If it was easy, then everybody would be doing it!

Starting out on living your dreams and pursuing them and taking action on them is often fraught with self-doubt, inner-criticism and fear.  That is what you are going through right now!!

Do you think creating a free and fair and democratic South Africa was easy for Madiba?

Or do you think that losing $900 million and then making $900 million was easy for Donald Trump?

Or do you think that being a Fairy Godmother is easy?  It certainly isn’t.

The secret is that the HARDEST part is always taking the leap of faith, taking those first steps towards your dreams and goals.    The amazing thing is that once you are in motion with following your dreams and goals it does get easier and easier.   I wrote an article about this last year called “The 3 phases of the Law of Attraction”.

Will Smith taught me something VERY valuable.  There is the difference between Talent and Skill.  Talent is inherent it is something you have.  You have a talent for writing, which is one of the reasons that you have come up with a Wildly Improbable Goal around writing novels.  However in your email you wrote “at school I outlined my essays and wham. Got top marks in the class almost all the time.”
If you analyse that sentence it will give you the answer. You were at school and you got taught the “skill” of writing an essay.  And then you practiced and practiced and did loads of assignments and because you combined the skill with the inherent talent that you have WHAM! You got great marks!

So with regards your writing a novel, just because it feels “hard” it doesn’t mean it is the wrong goal.  You just don’t have the skills yet for it to feel easy.  How do you get the skills?  You start to practice.  You may want to do a course or two and then practice some more.  You start writing longer pieces.  These may never be in your novel, but just begin by writing longer stories.  And keep writing until it does feel easy and your novel flows.

As a published author myself – there were times during the writing process where there was flow and inspiration and I loved it.  There were other times when I was writing my book that the creative process felt like I was scratching my nails down a blackboard.   But I just kept writing and now “The Fairy Godmother’s Guide to Getting What you Want” is out in the world and is inspiring you to live your dreams.

Quieten that self-sabotaging, doubtful inner voice and just start writing!

Love, wishes and magic

Donna – Your Fairy Godmother
P.S. Serendipity!

On this fabulous Valentine’s Day, I am interviewing Juanita Fouche on 101.9 Chai FM at 15h10 today.

Juanita Fouche is a woman who is truly living her dreams.  She is passionate about Pole Dancing and not only is she South Africa’s Pole Dancing Champion but she also runs an amazing studio called Basic Instincts, in Centurion, where she teaches pole dancing to others.

This Valentine’s Day I am going to be speaking to her about the importance of connecting to one’s own sensuality and sexuality in life.

You can also follow Juanita and Basic Instincts on Facebook

Today on my radio show “Interview with a Fairy Godmother” on 101.9 Chai FM, I will be interviewing a woman who is not only living her dreams but is passionate about making a difference to children in South Africa and across the globe.

Over the last 5 years, Zelna Lauwrens has built Equal Zeal into a successful business with 19 franchises across the country.

Equal Zeal is on a mission to help and support children to develop their self-esteem, confidence and the other tolls needed to give them a firm foundation for life ahead.